Funny birthday quotes are a way to say thank you to someone who is special on their birthday. Sometimes, people send happy birthday funny quotes as a gesture of how they really feel, but others use them as a way to get back at someone who has made fun of them in the past. No matter why you choose to give funny happy birthday quotes, they are sure to bring a smile to whoever reads them.
In general, a funny birthday quote is a brief, hopefully entertaining message that expresses thanks to someone celebrating a special day. It may include a joke, a clever pun or even a sentimental story. The best ones that one could receive from friends or loved ones in middle age would be those that appreciate funny things in everyday life. Being able to share funny birthday quotes when you don’t have a gift with people on their BDay, no matter how old they get, is always a great thing!
If you are looking for funny birthday quotes for someone who is older and will be turning in for their silver years, the best way to go about it is to look for the famous (as well as not-so-famous) sayings to give to them.
You can use these funny birthday quotes on cards, emails or text messages to let your special ones know that you are thinking about them and put a smile on their faces!
Top Funny Birthday Quotes
Lots of happy returns! I believe you can be officially valued at Antique Roadshow!
I wish you a happy birthday. I hope you enjoy your day as much as eating free cake and ice cream.
Your birthday only comes once a year, but the wrinkles it brings will last a lifetime.
If you were a dog … you would be 7 times older than now! Think about it. Happy birthday, you old shooter!
That’s your birthday cake ?! I thought we had a bonfire in the middle of your dining room. Congratulations… do I have to call the fire brigade and cancel?
I wish you a happy birthday. I wish you a happy birthday. Facebook told me it was your birthday and to write on your wall.
Happy birthday from one of the most spectacular, sensational and wisest people you know. You’re one-in-a-million.
My best wishes! I hope your husband treats you to a night out on the town so you can enjoy having the house to yourself!
Happy birthday to someone who knows everything there is about me and STILL enjoys being my friend. I hope we have wild and crazy adventures together for many years to come.
Did you know that Chuck Norris was born on your birthday? Just kidding. However, that would be quite a kick, wouldn’t it? Your birthday is still on a pretty good day.
I wish you the best! I’d say you don’t look another year older, but if I tell a lie now, everything else I say later can become incredible. You look pretty good for your age!
If you were a grape I’d stomp on you and turn it into a delicious vintage wine. Happy birthday friend!
The best part of the birthday is the birthday cake. I wish you the best. Where’s the cake?
Happy birthday to a friend I wouldn’t trade for all the Nutella in the world.
I couldn’t fit Channing Tatum in the box, but I hope this gift will. Happy birthday to the future Mrs. Channing Tatum.
So I looked at Jurassic Park and I remembered it was your birthday. Happy birthday, you old dinosaur!
I watched Grumpier Old Men and I remembered it was your birthday. I hope we will be accommodated in the same room in our future nursing home. We’d make some kick butt BINGO partners! We would clean up!
I have a certain number of skills. Skills learned from a long term friendship with you. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you give me a piece of cake, I’ll leave. If you don’t, I’ll find your cake and blow out your candles.
Funny Birthday Quotes For Everyone
Congratulations my friend! I look forward to meeting you tonight to go through all of your Facebook birthday wishes from people who have no rats chasing you for the rest of the year.
I’ll tell you a secret. I really believe it’s someone’s birthday and in case it is you, congratulations.
Happy birthday to someone who remembers how to do the Macarena.
Stop crying. This is supposed to be a joyous occasion where we fill a divine birthday cake and drink good cheer. Celebrate the day of your birth happily in this beautiful world. Forget about wrinkles, aching joints, forgetfulness and gray hair. Happiest Happy Birthday to you, dear friend!
When someone asks you if you are a God, say “YES!”. If you don’t, Mr. Stay Puft will destroy our town. That was life lesson # 1, right? Happy birthday to a friend who is fluent in movie quotes like me.
Happy birthday to someone who looks great, super smart, charismatic and charming. Wait … I meant FROM someone.
Best wishes. You’re not THAT old. You just got there. In Elsa’s words: “Let it go! Let it go!”
Your 21st birthday party was SO successful that you decided to celebrate it for over 20 years in a row!
I thought about it and I think if someone made a movie about your life, Linda Blair would be perfect to play you.
Do you know that old sang, the older you are, the wiser you are? I always thought it was true, but then I met you! Just kidding, buddy. I wish you a happy birthday.
I was in the downtown antique store and came across one of the toys from your childhood that you always talk about. Happy birthday and congratulations to someone old enough to include childhood toys in the latest edition of Kovel’s Antique Guide! Well done!
When you get that old, you really have to go gently to the wind and say, “Why not ?!”. You’re only young once! Go skydiving! Go skinny dipping in Tahiti! Take a leisurely hike to Mt. Everest.
Of all the people who celebrate their birthday today, you are the least likely to be called “young” by a door-to-door salesman. Enjoy your day!
Happy birthday to someone who gets more valuable and better with age! Oh wait, that’s wine. Happy birthday to someone just getting old!
Just to let you know that getting older doesn’t necessarily mean growing up. You can always be a “Toys R” Us “child wearing socks, wearing jelly shoes, and riding a Ferris wheel.
Happy birthday to someone I proudly say will ALWAYS be older than me. I love having you as my friend, even if it’s just to make myself feel better about my age.
I know you’re not thirty, flirty and prosperous, but hey, you’re still driving! You are not in too bad shape.
Short Funny Birthday Quotes
We thought we would get the right amount of candles to put on your cake this year, but we soon ran out of space. Happy Birthday!
One of the best pieces of advice in life is “you have to appreciate the little things”. That said, I know spotting little things is easier said than done at your age! Happy Birthday!
Since I usually forget everyone’s birthdays, you should consider it a miracle that I am sending you this message. Happy Birthday!
It’s time one of us turns 18! So drinks are yours! Happy Birthday!
Don’t get distracted by your age, it won’t be long before you can start learning to drive. But until then on the bike! Happy Birthday!
To my brother who still owes me some great ones. I didn’t give you a present this year, so let’s just mention it. Happy Birthday!
Ain’t no Cake Big Enough! | Funny birthday wishes for older and younger brothers
I can’t believe how big you get! Long gone are the days when I could steal cake from your plate and no one would ever be the wiser. Happy Birthday!
Don’t you think it’s time that we get older and stop painting the city? I know exactly what you are going to say. Next year. Happy Birthday!
I’m not a fan of overly sweet messages, as you know, birthdays are for fun! So let’s drop the old folks later and get out and about like we used to! Happy Birthday!
One more year to pretend you’re old enough to care about those around you.
You are not old. You’re just old enough to know better and not old enough to care. Happy Birthday!
The emergency department is on speed dial in case you have an unexpected asthma attack from blowing the candles.
Remember when we stayed late on the run from the law? No? Good. Me neither. Congratulations oldie
Another year to prove that older does not really mean wiser. Happy Birthday!
Getting old happens. Growing up is a choice. Happy Birthday.
Happy Birthday. You are one step closer to making diapers mandatory!
I made a list of words of wisdom that I wanted to give you for your birthday. It is still empty. Maybe next year.
May all your birthday wishes come true – except the illegal ones!
Chuck Norris wanted to apologize for not making it to your birthday party. He was doing geocaching in Antarctica. Happy Birthday.
Read Also >>> Lovely Happy Birthday Message For Friends On Their Day
Happy Birthday Funny Quotes
Cougar was like that last year. This year you are a cheetah, wild and fabulous !! Happy Birthday!!!
If “only the good die young”… I fear that you will celebrate a few more birthdays.
You can’t just wish someone a happy birthday, you have to shout it from the rooftops, start a conga line in the middle of the city, revive Julia Child to bake a three-layer ice cream cake!
Would you like some ice cream? Come on how about a chocolate cake? I’ll never see you again Come out the door. Come on let’s go and make a wish! Don’t tell me to let go as your birthday only comes once a year. We used to be best friends, now we are no longer. Do I really smell that bad? I want to wish you a happy birthday. Not behind a door.
I always limit my budget for buying birthday gifts to what that person gave me on my birthday. Enjoy your gift from nothing!
Congratulations to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.
Forget the past, you cannot change it. Forget about the future, you cannot predict it. Forget the present, I didn’t get you any.
May your Facebook wall be filled with birthday wishes from people you’ve never met, who haven’t seen you in years, or who really couldn’t care less.
On your birthday, don’t forget to set yourself sky-high goals and spend the rest of the year miserably building a rocket to get there.
Long Funny Birthday Quotes to Make Others Smile
May the odds ever be in your favor … and if not, I hope a Katniss takes your place because it won’t be me!
Get ready. An explosion of Facebook notifications is coming. Happy Birthday from the Lannisters… we never forget.
We don’t have any food! We don’t have any jobs! Our pets’ heads are falling off !! I hope you have a better day than Harry & Lloyd. Happy Birthday my friend!
Depressed because you are another year older? Look on the good side, you don’t live in North Korea where that evil dictator Kim Jong-un could kill you for it.
You know you are old when your social calendar says “Meet friends for coffee at the blood pressure clinic” every two weeks. Happy birthday you old fart.
I promise when you get old and forgetful I won’t let you forget to wash your hands after peeing or feeding your cat’s cat food rather than yourself. Happy Birthday Mom!
Cute Funny Birthday Quotes for Her
Best wishes for your birthday. In your honor I will refrain from whip and nae nae dance! Of course, if you really want me to do it, I can make a move.
Happy Birthday to the greatest female Homosapien who ever lived on the planet! Evolution stopped when it created you!
Congratulations to someone who doesn’t know how to load a dishwasher or fill their car’s gas tank!
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is definitely not as sweet as you are! Best wishes for your birthday! May your day be filled only with roses!
Happy Birthday!! You’re one in a million and I’d rather spend the day celebrating your birthday than anything but watching soccer, baseball, or hockey.
Happy birthday to someone comparable to fine wine and aged cheese. You get better with age, my love!
Congratulations to someone who doesn’t look as old as a dried out plum. May all of your dreams and wishes come true today and every day.
You definitely don’t look a day older than the age you tell people you are! Happy birthday to someone full of sugar and spices and all nice.
Happy birthday to someone who can make yoga pants and headbands look hot!
Awesome Funny Birthday Quotes for Him
You may not be Christian Gray, but I love you more and more every year! Happy birthday, my better version of Mr. Gray.
It is your birthday! I bring the fire extinguisher! Let’s get this party started! Happy Birthday! May all your dreams come true this New Year!
It’s really hard to shop for you … so I didn’t get you anything. Happy Birthday!
Congratulations to the only person I would save in the event of a zombie apocalypse.
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas!
Smart, handsome and funny. But enough about me. Happy Birthday!
Well done – you’ve been alive for several years!
Happy birthday to someone as sneaky and sneaky as me! You are a girl’s perfect partner in crime! May we still have many more crazy adventures together!
Always remember that every time birthday candles are blown out, a bottle of wine is born! The happiest birthdays for someone as amazing, incredible, and wonderful as you are!
I didn’t even have to be reminded by Facebook that today was your big day! Impressed?! Best wishes for your birthday!
For your special day, I’ve arranged a tour of the local assisted living facility! If we reserve your room now, you will receive a 20% discount! I hope you enjoy your great day! Happy birthday you old fart!
It is scientifically proven that people with more birthdays live longer.
Right, let’s get so drunk that in the end you think it’s my birthday and buy myself drinks all night
Happy birthday! Can you believe that we used to think that people our age were adults and had an okay life? Congratulations on getting older!
Happy birthday from someone who has to put up with burping, farting, scratching, and remote control!
I hope you don’t mind that I bought you a cake to give to your mother. I congratulate your mother for going into labor and giving birth to you. I mean, she was the one who did all the work. You just got out! Happy Birthday!
Congratulations! You are now one year closer to becoming known as the “dirty old man” !! Happy birthday on this incredible day.
I’m sorry I couldn’t let Kate Upton climb into the gift box. I still hope you like what I brought you! Happy birthday to a dirty old man!
Happy Birthday Images (In Addy to Funny Birthday Quotes)
Happy Birthday to me
Blow the candle and the foam, HAPPY BDAY!
Happy birthday, Happy health, wealth, lucky and success!
Happy birthday from the heart
Dog Funny Happy Birthday Quotes
Happy birthday stay cool
I wish you a A Very Happy Birthday!
Cool Funny Happy Birthday Quotes
I hope you will find this list of funny birthday quotes, Wishes, images, & card messages very useful, Enjoy your day!